Some days I feel like super-mom- the kids play happily, take naps at the same time and eat well while I am able to do laundry, clean, iron and get dinner on the table with time to spare. Those days, I feel amazing and accomplished and I wonder why I am not able to be that productive every day.
Other days, I feel like it's a challenge just to keep the kids happy, change their diapers and feed them and I'm lucky if I have time to go to the bathroom. On days like that, I often wonder, how do other moms do it? How is it that there are other moms with more children than me and they seem to get so much done? How do they keep up on a daily blog or do art projects or work from home? Some days I am surprised if I manage to get dressed and eat, let alone do anything else that is actually worthwhile and productive.
This leads me to wonder, am I just really lazy and tired some days while on other days I feel like being more productive? Why can't I do that every day? Well the answer lies in the middle. I have failed to mention what MOST days are like. Most days, I get some things done on my list, but not all. Most days, the kids overlap their naps at least half an hour, if not more, and I am able to eat lunch in peace. Most days, the kids play happily most of the time. These are normal days. And on a normal day, when I have a list of five things to do and at the end of the day, only two of them are done, it's okay. And if anyone ever wanted to know what I did all day that I couldn't accomplish five simple tasks while I was at home with my children, one day a few weeks ago, I wrote down what I did for an entire day before Jared gets home at 18:00 (honestly, this was more for my sake to see how I spent my time, but since I took the time to write it, I decided to share it here as well).
I included my list of things to do for the day. At first glance, it seems like it would barely take any time to complete these tasks. See how long it takes me to complete them (or not to)! Some days, I feel like putting "eat" and "shower" on the list, but I don't. If this seems long and very tedious, it is. That's how most days are :)
List of things to do today:
-devotion
-make grocery list/menu for the week
-one load of laundry
-respond to three emails
-iron Jared's shirt
-make dinner
6:45 Wake up, go to the bathroom, get tea kettle going, pour bowl of cornflakes, get out devotion book.
6:55 Avery wakes up. Change his diaper, put on clothes, get him milk, put Sesame Street on for him.
7:10 Cornflakes=soggy. Tea over-steeped but still hot. Sit down to do my devotion.
7:20 Avery wants more milk and breakfast.
7:25 Ophelia wakes up one hour earlier than usual. Looks like no shower today. Go upstairs to get dressed, get her, change her diaper, ger her dressed. Put her on floor with toys. Sit down to finish devotion.
7:35 Tea is cold. Reheat tea. By this time, Ophelia decides she is not happy sitting on the floor playing by herself, so I put her in my lap and she plays happily.
8:10 Sesame Street is over and Avery wants to watch more. Some days I let him (depending on my lack of sleep that morning and/or how much I need to get done still), but today I say no and try to get him interested in some toys. I finally get him to play with his Noah's Ark. Meanwhile, Ophelia is on the floor crying because I set her down to go in Avery's room and get him to play with a toy.
8:20 Pick up Ophelia to nurse her while Avery plays on the floor. I used to be able to check my email or facebook on my phone while Ophelia nursed, but now she gets super distracted and constantly turns her head to see what I'm doing, and of course she turns her head without unlatching, ouch, so I now just let her nurse and watch Avery play.
8:35 Set Ophelia down to play with Avery so I can finish my devotion. Reheat tea.
8:40 Devotion finished (two hours after starting. I should note, it's a 10-15 minute devotion). Play with kids. Try to teach Avery colors using the balls from the toy Ophelia is playing with. He's not interested.
9:30 Manage to make tuna salad for lunch quickly in the kitchen while the kids play.
10:00 Ophelia is tired. Go upstairs to put her down for a nap; she is asleep by 10:10.
10:15 Avery is hungry. Get him lunch. Try to make menu/grocery list for the week while he eats. This is interrupted by the following: Avery wants water, then milk, drops his fork, spills his bowl of food and wants seconds.
10:45 Read books with Avery, continue trying to teach Avery colors. He's not interested. He'd rather practice counting.
11:15 Ophelia wakes up. Change diaper. Kids play on the floor while I try to write some emails. Get two of the three done.
11:35 Change Avery's diaper, get him milk, and put him down for a nap; Ophelia is crying on the floor the whole time because I left the room.
11:45 Put Ophelia in the high chair with some graham crackers while I get myself some lunch. I eat while continuously picking up crackers and helping Ophelia eat.
12:00 Put in a load of laundry; Ophelia lays on the floor on her stomach trying to crawl. I try to read while she plays but after reading only 2 pages in 15 minutes, I give up and just play with her.
12:30 Nurse Ophelia.
1:00 Switch laundry to the dryer.
1:30 Avery wakes up. I put on Jake and the Neverland Pirates for him.
1:40 Go upstairs to try to put Ophelia down for a nap. She fights it and I finally have to nurse her down and she's asleep by 2.
2:00 Do the dishes
2:20 Lay down on the couch to take a break while Avery finishes his show and Ophelia is sleeping.
2:30 Ophelia wakes up. Grr. Super short nap. Change her diaper. Avery wants me to get out his zoo. We all play on the floor with his zoo.
3:10 Feed Ophelia food in the highchair. Avery asks for a snack. I give him some celery and carrots that he eats while he's playing. Then Avery decides he wants to help me feed Ophelia so he sits on my lap eating his snack while I try to feed Ophelia.
3:35 Avery starts bringing Ophelia toys to play with on the highchair. This amuses her for 5 minutes while I'm cleaning her and the tray up from all the spilled food due to Avery "helping."
3:40 Watch an episode of Colbert Report while holding Ophelia on my lap on the floor and playing with Avery.
4:15 I remember that the laundry is done and sitting in the dryer. I go and get it and fold the laundry while the kids play. I have to stop several times to stop Avery from stealing toys from Ophelia and to pick Ophelia up after falling over repeatedly.
4:45 Ophelia is tired again due to her short nap. Bring her upstairs and nurse her to sleep.
5:00 Get puzzles out for Avery so I can make dinner.
5:30 Dinner is cooking. Ophelia wakes up. Avery wants me to do his puzzles with him.
5:50 Set the table and do last minute dinner preparations.
6:00 Jared arrives home to a table set and dinner hot and ready! Success!
I finished everything on the list except one email and ironing the shirt. It was a good day.
Monday, January 28, 2013
Monday, January 14, 2013
How to Make an Anglofile...?
I have no qualms admitting that I am an Anglofile. I love just about everything that has to do with our Imperial cousins. And so, as any mother would wish, I would love it if Ophelia wound up loving England as I do, so that we can share this love for many years together. So this begs the question-do I let my daughter decide if she likes all things British herself, or do I "brainwash" her from an early age to love Jane Austen, Downton Abbey, Colin Firth and of course, Harry Potter? Is that even brainwashing if it's awesome?
Growing up, most kids at some point feel like their parents are pushing them to like or pursue things that either they liked or did, or what they themselves wished they could do when they were growing up. This isn't necessarily a bad thing as sometimes it just makes sense. For example, I wanted to be in band, so I was encouraged/made to play the trumpet since my dad did and they had a trumpet. Band, and playing trumpet, turned out to be pretty much the only thing that I liked about high school. Sometimes a dad loves a particular sport and naturally wants his son to play that sport so that they can have something in common. If the son wants to play sports anyway, a push in one direction isn't a bad thing.
But when is it a bad idea? I think sometimes it's obvious if you are making your kid do something they hate or despise. But what about when it comes to what they like? Can you "brainwash" them at a young age to have the same interests as you? And if you can, is that okay? Obviously it's impossible not to influence your child at all- you will inherently be a part of their lives, and they will see and experience what you expose them to. How far can a parent go though? Is over-exposing your kid to something at a young age brainwashing or is it just a natural part of growing up?
Basically, what I'm getting at is, is it bad that I hold my daughter while standing five feet away from our 44" TV and watch Downton Abbey for an hour? Or is that too much?
Because I've done this multiple times now. She wants to be held. I want to watch Downton Abbey. So I hold her, while I watch, and she is mesmerized, and inside I am bursting with excitement when I think about how we will watch Jane Austen movies together when she's 5 and how much fun we will have together when she is older reading great British novels and enjoying BBC miniseries together. Am I naive to think that I can shape and mold her interests this easily? Or, is it really that easy?
On a related note: no, my left arm is not ridiculously bigger than my right, although one would think that holding a 22 pound child for hours on end would build up certain muscles. Sadly, after two children that needed to be held a lot, I have found this not to be the case. My arm and back, instead, suffer greatly from extended holding of said heavy children. However, I wouldn't trade that for anything :)
Growing up, most kids at some point feel like their parents are pushing them to like or pursue things that either they liked or did, or what they themselves wished they could do when they were growing up. This isn't necessarily a bad thing as sometimes it just makes sense. For example, I wanted to be in band, so I was encouraged/made to play the trumpet since my dad did and they had a trumpet. Band, and playing trumpet, turned out to be pretty much the only thing that I liked about high school. Sometimes a dad loves a particular sport and naturally wants his son to play that sport so that they can have something in common. If the son wants to play sports anyway, a push in one direction isn't a bad thing.
But when is it a bad idea? I think sometimes it's obvious if you are making your kid do something they hate or despise. But what about when it comes to what they like? Can you "brainwash" them at a young age to have the same interests as you? And if you can, is that okay? Obviously it's impossible not to influence your child at all- you will inherently be a part of their lives, and they will see and experience what you expose them to. How far can a parent go though? Is over-exposing your kid to something at a young age brainwashing or is it just a natural part of growing up?
Basically, what I'm getting at is, is it bad that I hold my daughter while standing five feet away from our 44" TV and watch Downton Abbey for an hour? Or is that too much?
Because I've done this multiple times now. She wants to be held. I want to watch Downton Abbey. So I hold her, while I watch, and she is mesmerized, and inside I am bursting with excitement when I think about how we will watch Jane Austen movies together when she's 5 and how much fun we will have together when she is older reading great British novels and enjoying BBC miniseries together. Am I naive to think that I can shape and mold her interests this easily? Or, is it really that easy?
~
Friday, January 4, 2013
7 months later...
The last time I posted, I was about to have a baby. Ophelia Maize is now over 7 months old. Some would say that it is excusable to not make writing a blog a priority when you have a newborn. Others would say I'm lazy. While I'm sure my reasons for not continuing lie somewhere in between, I would still like to make the effort to write again. When I started thinking about continuing this blog, I toyed with a few different ideas of how I could write about something different, or choose a different focus...but now it's been months and this lack of focus or direction has led me to do absolutely nothing. So instead I have decided that I just need to start writing and see where it takes me. I'm sure a lot of my posts will be filled with anecdotes about my children or incessant complaining about their sleep schedules (or lack there of), but I am hoping to also fill it with new things I learn as well as generic observations and adventures.
So to begin: If you know me at all, you probably also know that my wonderful son Avery doesn't sleep well. And while I try not to complain about this, I often do. I have to remind myself of all the things he is awesome at (which is everything else, really). So today, I'm going to praise Avery's eating habits. Lately, he has taken to walking to the fridge to ask for something to eat, asks us to open the door, and then looks in the fridge, pondering what to eat. Today, he picked out the following meal: string cheese, turkey, blueberries, broccoli and grape tomatoes. I then put it all on his plate, showed it to him and he said, "oh boy!!" and ran to his chair in the dining room. He was SO excited to eat. This scenario is an almost daily occurrence (with the food varying of course).
It's these little victories that remind me that while Jared and I can't do that much to control his sleep issues (sometimes I think I might have done something wrong, or not done something, to contribute to this problem, but we did nothing different with Ophelia and she has no problems), we have done fairly well when it comes to things we can help control, like helping him develop and create healthy eating habits. I am so thankful that he is a good eater :)
So to begin: If you know me at all, you probably also know that my wonderful son Avery doesn't sleep well. And while I try not to complain about this, I often do. I have to remind myself of all the things he is awesome at (which is everything else, really). So today, I'm going to praise Avery's eating habits. Lately, he has taken to walking to the fridge to ask for something to eat, asks us to open the door, and then looks in the fridge, pondering what to eat. Today, he picked out the following meal: string cheese, turkey, blueberries, broccoli and grape tomatoes. I then put it all on his plate, showed it to him and he said, "oh boy!!" and ran to his chair in the dining room. He was SO excited to eat. This scenario is an almost daily occurrence (with the food varying of course).
It's these little victories that remind me that while Jared and I can't do that much to control his sleep issues (sometimes I think I might have done something wrong, or not done something, to contribute to this problem, but we did nothing different with Ophelia and she has no problems), we have done fairly well when it comes to things we can help control, like helping him develop and create healthy eating habits. I am so thankful that he is a good eater :)
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